Gelato is the best variety ever. Try to change my mind
Every weed smoker has an opinion about the best strain ever, as we all have different experiences and memories associated with certain strains. But today I mark the end of all this subjectivity: once and for all I crowned Gelato as the greatest of all time – the GOAT.
Let me tell you why
What is gelato?
Gelato is a cross between Sunset Sherbert and Thin Mint GSC that tastes like a grape-flavored ice cream cone with no calories. Born in 2014 to members of the cookie family Mario Guzman (Mr. Sherbinski) and Jai Chang (Jigga), Gelato usually produces dense purple-accented flowers with orange hairs wrapped around the nug like your mother’s hug.
There are a wide variety of gelato phenos or varieties on the market, in particular: Gelato No. 25 (also known as Barry Bonds), Gelato No. 33 (Larry Bird), Gelato No. 41 (Bacio Gelato), Gelato No. 42 and Gelato # 45 (Michael Jordan).
My personal favorite is # 33 because it was used to make another favorite of mine, Ice Cream Cake, but honestly they all hit a you-wow.
Since its birth, Gelato’s taste has blown countless consumers, winning multiple Emerald Cups, Cannabis Cups and even Leaflys Strain of 2018.
Leaflys variety 2018 of the year
The gelato experience is second to none
Our conversation can really start and end with how well gelato smokes. The smell? According to. The taste? Sweet. Gassy. The smoke? Smooth. Wonderful. It’s a combination of all the good things cannabis comes in, all in one strain, like a cannabis captain planet.
Besides the taste, fam, why does gelato clap like that ?! No Deadass, every time I smoke gelato, regardless of the breeder, the high puts your boy’s brain on autopilot. It’s not necessarily a sleepy high, but also intense relaxation that makes you feel like the day may really end now.
If you think of the definition of stoned as a dummy high where you don’t want to do anything but sit around and be goofy or absent-minded, this is gelato.
Gelato has the “Ooohweee, what’s that ?!” factor
One of the best feelings in the world is giving someone a joint with an ooohweee sticky gum and they say, “Damn what is that ?!” inhale after the first one.
With a mysterious gelato joint, you get 100% reaction – not 99.9, a hunna. It has such a uniquely delicious taste that it feels more like smoking candy than smoking weed.
Not a single person has ever smoked a fresh batch of gelato flower or blobs and thought, “I don’t get the hype.” If so, they need to see a therapist about their ingrained insecurities projected onto the best weed they have ever smoked.
Grape is the best taste of cannabis, fight me
Gelato spawned our exotic weed obsessions
Look, if you smoke the zaza that goes straight to the māthā, you can thank Gelato’s influence for getting you there. Gelato is the type of dessert that is setting consumers on the West Coast on the hunt for exotic varieties.
I’m not going to say that gelato is the first variety to ever have a unique taste or hype – that would be wrong in every way. But I’ll say gelato from modern strains of weeds that will advance genetics will definitely do so. Cookies have deleted an all-timer, accept it.
Gelato ran so Runtz could fly
(Courtesy of cookies)
Runtz is probably the most sought after strain on pharmacy shelves today, a cross between Gelato and Zkittles. Without gelato, Runtz would never exist (in the truest sense of the word).
Following his genetics, Runtz splashed on stage and became an overnight favorite like Drake with So Far Gone in 2009. When we consider which strain paved the way for cultural adoption, Gelato is definitely 808s & Heartbreak because So Far Gone would never have existed without it. Real minds know.
The Leafly Strain of 2020 is – Runtz!
Gelato’s position in pop culture
Last but not least, Gelato’s influence on pop culture. Everyone wants to smoke rapper weed, and gelato is definitely a hip-hop favorite.
Young Dolph has a song called “Gelato”; Amine has a song called “Gelato”; Boosie refers to “Weed Head X4”; Juice Wrld (RIP) mentions gelato on “Stay High”; Future mentions Gelato on “First Off”; Lil Uzi Vert has a great background full of gelato on “Run It Up”; G-Eazy Talks to Gelato about “Shake It Up”; Gelato is even in Offset’s verse about a Calvin Harris song. Calvin Harris playing songs in Famous Footwear, fam.
Given its smokability, divisibility, influence, heritage, and relevance, it’s damn easy to see that gelato is the GOAT of weed strains.
Argue with someone who cares.
Danté Jordan is a former member of the Leafly Subject Matter Expert team and is currently a freelance writer, video producer, and media consultant specializing in cannabis culture, strains, products, education, and everything else related to this little green flower. Contact him at Smokingwithdante on Instagram or at dantenetworks (at) gmail (dotcom). His website is www.dantejordan.com.
Show item by Dante Jordan
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